Finding True Love

I can rationalize what I do,

Saying I’m doing it for you.

Who?

You.

I’m selfless you see, despite my hidden motives of getting what I want for me.

I think that if I give you want you will in turn give me what I need.

I haven’t asked you but hope that some comment planted a seed.

But you don’t catch on and go on your merry way,

Taking what I gave and leaving me to say “Hey,”

“What happened?” I did as you asked but now

I find myself out in the cold, abandoned somehow.

You didn’t read my mind and acquiesce.

You didn’t even notice or guess

That I wanted something for in return of what I gave:

Recognition, a thank you or even just a wave.

After all, I moved over and let you pass.

You left me in the dust and alas

I finally realize I expected what you could not give--

To read my mind as if it’s a sieve

Where my needs go out from me and enter your head

I take care of you and you take care of me –but, instead

You didn’t agree to this and now I resent

What I did with a motive that was bent

I said I wanted to please you, but really you see

I was trying all along to get you to do it for me.

Okay, so if I stop this dance and instead seek out

God’s love and find out what that’s about

I’ll find that loving God means loving myself

Then I can care for you without putting me on a shelf

Then true love with you I will share

You may not return it but I won’t care

Because God will see that someone else will

Find my love fitting and return it to me in full.